man shovels poo, enjoys his time

i’ve become increasingly more paranoid about what the animals do during a rain storm.  let’s face it, we all stay inside, and they’re all together, conspiring willy nilly about who knows what. 

exhibit, a:  look at those beady eyes:and b:  undeniably suspicious nostrils:

and so.  in an effort to prove my hypothesis, and crack the cartel like behavior i’m certain these animals engage in whenever the opportunity strikes, i hit them when they least expect it—the cloak of rain!

as the rain came on, i put on my rain gear and quietly infiltrated the hogs, perfectly camouflaging into my surroundings.

for the next two hours i danced an elegant ballerina like mud shit dance that mostly resembled good curling form, shoveling our feeding pad entirely crystal clean in the process.  i removed hundreds of pounds and inches of mudshitbloodfoodcrust that had compacted over the recent drought. 

as odd of a job as shoveling mudshit might sound, the task was one of the more rewarding of the week. physically demanding, but also rewarding, the simple task of moving mud from a to b, became a meditative, energizing, and most gratifying task.

oh, right—and as far as those conspiring beasts?  i was right.  human trafficking, meth distribution, and a huge range of aerial fireworks and booze to underage local teens.  we’ve alerted the local authorities.